frost_jewel | 20. [mostly action]

[Mia has been through a lot recently. The invasion wasn't so terrible, but its aftermath and the information surrounding it dealt a blow she still hasn't been able to face properly. Then, some of her dearest people went on a mission that continues to tear them apart inside - and may do a similar thing to all of them in due time, depending on what happens as a result. Then she became, briefly, herself but a few years younger, which might sound like a reprieve but was really just a way of delaying the inevitable backlash. Mia knows better than to think that that might be the 'punishment' coming to them after aiding in the implementation of a shift explosive.

In all that time, the way she interacts with people shifted, too. She is as friendly and welcoming as ever, but in some places more...distracted-seeming, perhaps, or carrying an air of professional civility instead of closeness. If anything, her tenure as pre-adventure Mia only reinforced her ability to stand at that distance.

Things haven't much calmed down, but she can't think of a time better than the present to take care of some things she's put off since the invasion happened. Shuffling them all around her work schedule means it happens at odd hours, but that's just how things have to be. She seeks out specific friends of hers, and stops by the plaza clinic to see who might be around. It isn't her usual routine, but she also goes to the cafe - though hardly a coffee drinker - for a change of pace. The gallery too.

Sometime in the afternoon, she finds a quiet corner to attempt to send a filtered message to Luceti's newest in-world resident, without knowing exactly how:]

Could we speak about a few things in person?

[It might work, it might not.

No matter how that turns out, as night falls she'll skip training, opting to visit the beach instead. To walk along the water with her bare feet in the sand and...hope that helps, somehow.]

[[ooc: Building walls with lego-bricks made of words, around here. Go nuts! Just not totally nuts.]]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[She looks him in the eye, silent.]

[Shikamaru sighs. And considers. Staring off into the space over her shoulder, he continues.]

There's something you're failing to consider, when you say he has the same duty as you do. [He doesn't miss that she's may be talking about several people, not just Law, but he can't speak for those.

In truth, maybe he can't speak for Law either.]

He's a doctor, not a healer. Even then, to him that is not his most important role. To think so is a mistake.

[The truth ringing in his words doesn't make them any easier to understand. How could he - or anyone - accept the role of doctor or healer without the knowledge that it was the most important one when they did so? It didn't limit a person to only that, of course, all people had passions and interests and other things they were good at and, at times, other duties of necessity.

But.]

Then I have been mistaken.

He's a pirate.

[He meets her eyes now. Pirate is not a duty he can define; the meaning seems to hold a different value in Law's world.]

I have no doubt being a doctor is important to him. But as a pirate, whatever that means to him... That matters more.

[Suddenly Mia feels a headache coming on.]

It isn't...exactly that. I know- that all of us working here, and in the other clinic, have important things to do that aren't about healing people.

It's...hard to explain. [It was hard to hear, at the time.]

[Hard to explain? He doesn't know where she's going with that, so he'll give her a shot at it anyways.]

This time...and maybe other times, if I care to spend the energy thinking about them- it's not the choice itself, that was bad. It's that there were better ones. There were ways to not kill people, even indirectly.

It's just. Those- they wouldn't have been advantageous. [Mia isn't the type to say 'or whatever' but it is very implied.]

...you're thinking too hard on it.

[Something in her stance deflates completely.]

Is that meant to sting more because it comes from you?

[He shakes his head.]

No. I just know my teammates.

Your teammates?

[She has a guess. She hopes it's not entirely right.]

They were there. [But what they felt isn't the important part; he's not there to defend them (but he would to the death) so much as use them as an example. With his thumb, he taps his heart.] The both of them think with this more than they do their heads. They, and most of the people there, wouldn't have been looking for ways out over advantages.

I didn't mean to question your teammates. [With a lot of sincerity. As she said to Luke when it happened, she wasn't there and judging their decision as a whole feels sloppy and pointless.]

[He waves a hand.]

You didn't. I say it for your sake.

Then I don't understand. For my sake?

No matter what I say, you're going to dwell on what happened trying to realize how it could've been handled differently. Each time you'll feel worse for it.

That in itself is hard enough. I don't want you losing faith in anyone from this village, thinking they had the opportunity to save people and chose not to when the reality is they never had that chance.

[Mia shakes her head, slowly.]

No. There is nothing to gain from trying to change the past inside my head. I wasn't there, and nothing I could have done will change it.

It's not that I've lost faith in us, not completely. It's...it's that I know that it's better to make the right choice even when others will disagree. Not to give in to...agreeing for personal gain. Or anything like that.

That's what I mean. There was no right choice, not this time. By your definition of it, all options contained wrong choices.

[To her credit, Mia does not sigh. She holds her tongue for a long time, not quite looking at him but not looking away, either.

She cannot make him understand. He said it himself, first - they think differently. The best, maybe the only thing she can do, is to keep doing what she already does.]

There isn't anything else to say.

[He does not have such composure. He sighs, but he's the one who told Mia to, in effect, be stubborn. As such, he shouldn't have expected differently.

It just doesn't sit well with him, that the others be blamed for something that could not have been prevented, whether they were involved or not.]

Anyways... Thanks for your help today.

I'm sorry, Shikamaru. Maybe some day I'll be able to explain it better. I don't know if I can trust him in all the ways I did before this.

[If that's not an actual explanation then she doesn't yet know what is. Then:]

And I hope what you're going through turns out to be something not serious.

I don't care much of what you think of Law.

[He waves a hand, as he hops off the table. It was only fair to say what he did; as a friend, he felt he owed that much, even if he's upset with the man too.]

It was the others I was thinking of.

I don't have anything to think about the others. Who am I to call into question what a strategist or a soldier would do?

[The comment stops him before he can get to the door. She'll catch a glimpse of genuine surprise, then appreciation.]

You're made of stronger stuff than I give you credit for.

[Was that a compliment?]

Ah...thank you, I think.

[action]

endgames - 2013-10-31 04:30 (UTC) - Expand

frost_jewel - 2013-10-31 19:51 (UTC) - Expand

endgames - 2013-11-02 03:11 (UTC) - Expand